I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been asked this during my life. In my mostly Jewish hometown of Highland Park, Ill., I towered over most of the kids my age, and my red hair, freckles, and translucent skin stood out next to my petite, dark skinned, dark haired, dark eyed parents and brother. When I joined the Federation, I felt like I should carry around my naming, Bat Mitzvah, and wedding paperwork as proof of my identity as I was often questioned about it.

I’ve always known I was adopted and born to a Jewish mother but didn’t know much more about the generations before her. That changed when I made my first trip to Israel in 2018. Despite being questioned throughout my whole life and, many times, being made to feel “less Jewish” than others, I immediately had this sense of being at home, belonging. The experience was such a pivotal point in my Jewish identity and also made me, as an adopted child, very curious about my background.

From Israel I ordered a “23 & Me” kit. When I got back the results, there wasn’t any Jewish DNA. This discovery prompted me to question my birth family’s history. Turns out, in 1960 a woman named Florence was married to a law student when she became pregnant with her fifth child. She and her husband knew they didn’t have the resources to raise the child in the way they wanted. Despite being Irish Catholic, Florence had a great affinity for the Jewish people, so she entered the synagogue in her neighborhood and asked the Rabbi to help her find a Jewish family to raise her child. The Rabbi knew of a couple in his congregation who had just lost a child and were looking to adopt. Once the baby was born; she was adopted by this couple, who named her Judith Ann Bloom and raised her in a Jewish home.

Eighteen years later, Judy got pregnant while in high school. She knew she couldn’t give her baby the life she wanted but wanted her child to be raised in a Jewish home. A few months after I was born, Judy put her baby, me, up for adoption. Just after my adoption, my parents, Susan and Zane Chait, had me named, Leah Melcah, by the same Rabbi who would later perform my Bat Mitzvah and our wedding.

Those 23 & Me results were a shock, but my identity as a Jewish woman wasn’t shaken. One of the reasons was the strong Jewish upbringing I had. The other was the involvement my children and I have with our Federation.

As CEO, I want to make sure our Federation creates that strong sense of belonging and identity for all of our community members. We are a small community, and I feel it’s even more important here than in the big cities for our children to feel proud of their heritage so they will follow in our footsteps and keep this community alive. The most involved Jews in our community can start as someone some wouldn’t consider “really Jewish.” We need to stop judging what is “Jewish.” It’s harmful for creating a unified community. Being Jewish looks different for every Jew. We need to work to create and sustain a community that meets people where they are and evolves… because WE REALLY ARE JEWISH!

Lisa

Lisa Long, Federation CEO

Read past LISA'S LONG VIEW columns HERE.